Reinvent Yourself the Blumenthal Way!

I’m tough on myself. There’s a lot I don’t like. I’m too broad around the midsection and my forehead has some permanent wrinkles already. (And no, it’s not due to constant surprises!) Then I look back and think there’s more I’d like to change. Perhaps a different alma mater? Higher GPA in high school?

Too bad I never met US Senate-hopeful Richard Blumenthal.

This wanna-be elected official in Connecticut seems to have fabricated portions of his career. Here’s a great video taken in 2008 – look for the catchphrase, “…from the days I served in Vietnam…”

Seems reasonable, no? Problem is all of his experience was States-side following a record five deferments.

So. One lie. Is that all?

As investigators pour over Dick’s record (why is it always a politician named Dick?), more anomalies appear. He says he was captain of the Harvard Swim Team. Now that might have been plausible if Blumenthal actually was on the team. Seems Dick wasn’t on the team he purported to captain. Oops.

In the face of mounting evidence and criticism, Richard Blumenthal has wedged himself into the corner of denial, stonewalling and obfuscation (”Here’s a video link where I accurately cite my Vietnam experience”).

So now I think. If I could re-make myself a la Blumenthal, what might I change? Maybe I won the Bermuda’s Cup in 1982. Perhaps I was founder of a major national charity that helps homeless youth. Or could I have been considered as the first non-scientific crew member of the Atlantis Space Shuttle.

No matter what I’ll have lost four inches off my waist and restored my smooth forehead. That’s my mimunum entry point for re-fabricating myself a la Blumenthal.

Dick is that you?

Dick. Is that you?

The Greeks Got Torries and Lib Dems Together

This morning I’m in a Brisbane hotel room listening to Nick Clegg, leader of Liberal Democrats in the UK, on BBC TV after forming an alliance with the Conservative Party to form a government. The uncertainty of the last five days is over and finally England has a new Prime Minister. (It isn’t Clegg but instead David Cameron as his Conservative Party - aka The Torries - had more votes.)

Just yesterday the sitting Prime Minister, Gordon Brown of the Labor Party, had resigned. It was a last ditch effort to get Labor in a deal with the Liberal Democrats. Seems poor Gordon fell on his sword for nothing.

But while the machinations were underway in the UK, over in Greece negotiations were underway to rescue that failed economy. (Oh, and in the USA the worst environmental disaster is still spewing oil.)

All this uncertainty has made the stock markets around the world plunge. Seemed we were on the verge of GFC 2.0 (Global Financial Crisis).

 So back in London - as their currency seesawed and the FTSE dove - it seems the Greeks did what history could never do. Today the Conservative Party and the Liberal Democrats are in government together.

My friend Phyllis is an animal lover who shares emails with heart warming photos. Today I received post-tornado images of dogs rescued. In one, the back seat of a car is covered with beagles and other dogs. In pops a cat - who is warmly welcomed. In the aftermath of a tornado, even a cat can find a home next to a blood hound. Is Clegg the cat? Cameron is definitely a hunting dog!

And whle the post-tornado photos does show species clinging together against instinct, in a few weeks the UK election tornado will pass. The cat would be smart to realise the love in transitory. Clegg is going to need to keep his claws sharp, as Cameron will come back to his senses and return to his hunting instincts!

On the Mat? On the Nose? On the Outer? Labor in State Politics

Thanks to the refined sensibilities of the sub-editor at “The Australian”, today we’re greeted with the headline:

Labor on the mat in two states

The article then details the drop in polling for state Labor parties in New South Wales and Victoria. If the elections were held tomorrow, Labor might limp home in Victoria however in New South Wales (NSW) the Coalition would win.

If the same headline were prepared for the sister publication, “The Daily Telegraph”, perhaps the headline would read:

Labor on the nose

That’s a direct reference to something odoriferous. Seems it isn’t only fish and friends who stink after three days.

Oddly enough, the Federal election must be held before the NSW state elections are due. That leaves Prime Minister Kevin Rudd facing the electorate when the most populous state despises his state-based peers. Face it. In NSW we’ll change governments when elections are due in early 2011. Yet before the end of 2010 Prime Minister Rudd needs to call a federal poll.

What to do? Punish the Big Boss for the inactions of his underlings? Of course! Retribution feels too good not to practice frequently.

So whether it’s on the mat, on the ouster, on the nose or just plain rotten – Labor in NSW is ripe for change!

Desperately Seeking Interns, New Recruits

The CEO of an automotive components manufacturer shared with me it was easier to shrink than to grow. When business is contracting you know what to do and when - you understand how many people you need for a certain level of business. If you used to have revenue of $800 million and contractions brought you down to $500 million you just referred to your game plan from that stage of development.

Growth is a lot harder to manage.

When your business is growing you’re unsure when and where to hire. Which team needs resources first? Is the business permanent or a short-term spike? Can teams manage with a little more focus?

Since October 2009 the revenue at Fleishman-Hillard in Sydney has doubled. We expect a 50% increase in the next two months. The team has gone from restless to overworked in a short space.

Thankfully the last months I’ve focused on setting in place the senior team, with a good tranche of mid-level executives. Today we need starter professionals. We have capacity for two interns and two junior professionals (2-4 years experience). For all roles you need to have the right to permanent residency in Australia - a short-term international visa won’t help, as we try to find interns capable of full time employment at the end of their term.

Our internships last three months and require a minimum of three days per week - with a preference for full-time. These are paid at a nominal level ($100 per day to defray expenses).

For Account Executives and Senior Account Executives, our greatest need today is in healthcare, consumer health/wellness and fast moving consumer goods. While we do have practices in corporate and technology, those are both fully staffed at present.

Please note this is for our Sydney office - learn more here: http://fleishmanhillard.com/careers/internships-scholarships/

I look forward to hearing from you!

Treasure Trove of Tweets

Last weekend Leichhardt Council organised a community garage sale day. Households were encouraged to off-load old goods one day in advance of council clean-up day. The goal was to reduce landfill and nearly everything went. What didn’t sell was left kerbside for scavengers to review overnight. By morning little was left. Mission accomplished!

During the sale I was distracted by an old box filled with old correspondence. My friends Iva and Bill were married 24 years ago. Their wedding invitation was there as good as new. One letter made me sad - it was from my grandmother. She and I shared a special relationship. She’s been dead for ten years now. There were first anniversary cards from my partner of 19 years. And letters - lots and lots of letters.

In the interests of second hand commerce I closed the box but refused to sell the container - or ditch the contents. Perhaps I’ll re-open that box another ten years from now and really review the contents. Or perhaps my son will ditch it when I’m dead. Who knows.

What I enjoyed the most was the ability to reflect back on all that had happened. That’s where electronic media lets us down. Will I prop myself up in a retirement village and scan old blog posts on an iPad? Could I shuffle my Flickr photos on an eFrame? And what about all the correspondence that I receive? Just because I helped Ashton Kutchner get to one million doesn’t mean I want his Tweets in my memory book.

The Library of Congress in the USA announced it is cataloguing and saving every Twitter posting since 2006. As there are 300,000 new updates each day the investment in data storage technology is considerable. (Until we all get a 1TB USB free with a petrol fill.) It’s nice to read our micro-blogging conversations will be stored, catalogued and ready for retrieval. 

Perhaps one day I will go back over all my postings (”G’Day old self - and you thought 48 was bad!”). Yesterday we took Ethan to the Powerhouse Museum and revelled over their exhibition, “The 80s Are Back.” There was an old mix tape - just like the ‘best of’ cassettes I loved. Those days you needed absolute quiet and precision timing with your record player to make sure the segues weren’t faulty. Now it’s a case of drag and drop with the click of options to ensure a smooth transition.

Hopefully the quick and efficient review of on-line correspondence and postings will be that simple in years to come. If not? Frankie Says Relax.

Frankie Says Relax

Chief Marketing Officer: Which Social Media To Use!

There are so many useful platforms in social media it’s hard to keep track of what to use when. For the marketing professional, you may want a site that optimises your search engine, or something else that gives you good brand exposure.

Making the social media rounds this week is a wonderful chart put together by CMO.com. This is a group for Chief Marketing Officers and is laden with useful information and tools. The chart below can be downloaded as a .pdf file by clicking here: Social Media Landscape

Social Media Landscape

Now you know that Twitter is good for customer communication, and Linked In is awful for driving traffic to your site. Who knew? CMO knew!

And the Oscar goes to…Twitter!

 And the Oscar goes to…Twitter!

The downside of living in Australia is the Oscars are held during our work day. While North Americans are snug in their TV rooms we’re in our cubicles hashing out assignments. It’s the nature of our time zone. Yes, one of the penalties of living in the world’s most livable city is we’re always a day ahead. Alas.

Yet on Oscar night the torment is all the worse. In the Age of Twitter, every update was available on the instant. Even Associated Press couldn’t post wire columns fast enough to keep up with the flow from Twitter. Charlize Theron’s dress?

Cherryandjoy: Just had my fix of the Oscars dresses- Rachel mcAdams looked fab in Elie Saab but what was Charlize Theron thinking?!

When some favourite films were overlooked?

She_Beautiful: WHAT THE F**K?!?!?! HOW DID PRECIOUSNOT WIN?!?? Yo this s**t is fkn FIXED! Ugh! #Oscars -____-
(Apologies She_Beautiful as I have corporate minders to watch so I asterisked your post!)

AllisonWestover: Why Oscar chose “Hurt Locker” over “Avatarhttp://twurl.nl/bjyzhk http://bit.ly/ZoPj1

And of course the after-parties!

muthafcknerica: I have 2 admit Grammy after partiesare awsome, but Oscar parties are fabulous. Vanity Fair party was breathtaking. #nocomparison

Now why did Vanity Fair misplace my invitation again? That’s 20 years in a row!

The Twitter posts came so fast and so furious it was hard to keep up. Near the conclusion I entered “Oscars” and a slew of postings came up. In under one minute and additional 28 posts were made on the same subject.

Of course it was hard to concentrate at work as colleagues screamed out “Jeff Bridges” or “Sandra Bullock” or “Up”! In the end the show has yet to start here in Sydney but I already know all the winners. I suppose getting a photo to go along will add the glamour to the clamour!

 “Dressed like the Oscars statuette”

Or maybe not - Thanks E! Online for all the photos…

I know who you are. St George Bank sent me YOUR statement.

Today I received your bank statement. It was addressed to me, and it had my private, family company name on the top. After that, it had all your personal information.

I know you receive benefits from Centrelink, and that you shop on iTunes. Your medical coverage is with Medibank - there’s even your account number. You’re self-employed because I see the deposits of the client invoices, and the project descriptions. I know you live near Leichhardt because that’s where you buy petrol. When you were on holiday in Perth I know where you stayed and that you even got a traffic fine, which you paid on 23 February. I know where you grocery shop (Woolworths Leichhardt).

What do you know about me?

Last month St George Bank mailed the wrong personal banking information to the wrong customers. I got your statement. You have mine. See story here: http://tinyurl.com/ya54maf

But the bank cares. In their letter they said they’re investigating and will be certain this doesn’t happen again. They have a 24-7 dedicated telephone line. I called on Sunday at 12:00 noon - and was put on hold for 10 minutes (”Because your call is important”). When I asked who received my statement, the female operator started lecturing me that no one could tell who I was by my banking information.

Yet I know your wife is named Leanne - because when you made an Internet Withdrawal you wrote the memo that it was for Leanne’s hair products.

So tell me St George. I know this other person. I have their detailed financial history. You’ve made no effort to reclaim these statements and your bossy operator told me I needn’t worry. You’re taking this seriously. You’re conducting an investigation. Yet the front page of your web site gives none of that away - there’s no mention.

Great job St George. At least I know this statement isn’t for Westpac-St George CEO Gail Kelly. I don’t believe she received Centrelink payments. Nor would she like her personal information in another person’s hands. Just like me.

Dragon Slayer

Two Worlds of Employment: Australia at Apex, America at Nadir

I need to hire good people and I need to hire them now. Australia is approaching technical full employment. That’s when anyone who wants a job is able to find one. There are always that cannot work or choose to lay low for awhile. The skills demand is even tougher in some technical areas of public relations (technology, healthcare, finance, digital). See the role we’re recruiting for now on Linked In.

Yet across the Pacific it’s bad news in America. Not only is unemployment static at just under 10%, the length of unemployment exceeds anything seen in recent history. NPR reports the average length is six months - with some reporting of a year or more without work.

The fall-out in America of long-term unemployment is going to be felt at the polls. Any government in power when the economy is down fares badly. In Australia we may be unhappy with elements of government, but since the economy is doing so well we’ll just leave the incumbents in power. Obama’s mid-term elections occur in November.

Will this be the “Change” he spoke so passionately about?

Gold-Gate: PR Con Artist, Gold Sales and a Twist

Poor Jothy Hughes. This “publicist” couldn’t get his client on national television. The firm bought gold, so Jothy arranged for actresses to pose as divorcees. At a staged event they would sell their wedding jewels and act excited by the value. Hooray for divorce!

Is Mrs Scrooge McDuck free tonight for a party?But Jothy’s emails trying to tempt gold-diggersgold sellers were published. Now Jothy’s dodging camera crews in car parks and his employer refuses to acknowledge his existence. The story received national airplay in AUstralia on “Today Tonight” and “A Current Affair”.

A PR man’s worst nightmare? Maybe not.

One conspiracy theorist notes the responses and car park interviews are too polished. Was this guy caught out or stage managed? The crisis has forced gold buying parties into prominence never-before seen.

Now I know I’m supposed to be creative in my job. But it never occurred to me to fake a crisis in order to propel further media.

Is that what those Exxon Valdez guys were thinking?

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